Girls Aloud Are Back To Give Us More Pop That Will Never Be As Good As Spice Girls

Cheryl Cole and those other four strippers who couldn't find work when Girls Aloud took a three-year break are back together to inflict mediocrity upon the gullible pop-hungry once again. And, look at that — not only has it been 10 years since these broads were manufactured on UK program Pop Stars: The Rivals, their brand new Twitter account is threatening something or other called Ten.

This trash would be easily handled by one simple pay-per-view event: five bimbos, 10 legs, one stripper pole — have at it, ladies.